illicitizen news: Verizon, my tin can needs a new wire or maybe you could stop...

Verizon, my tin can needs a new wire or maybe you could stop those annoying commercials with all the #$@%*^! lightning bolts and go to something more representative. I dunno maybe a snail that has had a stroke or a turtle pulling a 1000 lb sled uphill in a stiff headwind?