James Lee Stanley

I just had the most singular experience  at the post office.    Sometimes I feel like I am from another planet.   This may not seem like it applies to music or musicianship, but I think it does.  I’ll show you…

I stood in line at the postage machine and when my turn came, took my fifteen packages (cd’s) and proceeded to weigh and stamp each one.

In a few moments, an attractive woman came in and stood behind me waiting her turn.   I smiled and said, “It won’t be  much longer.”

“You know, I only have one package.”  She indignantly replied.  “You shouldn’t be allowed to do so many packages.”

I looked at her and said, “do you actually think that I should stop what I am doing, total out my card and step aside so that you can mail your package and then start my own process all over again?”

“Well, I only have one package.  And you shouldn’t be allowed to do this.  You should just let me mail my package.”

“Your sense of entitlement is way over the top.  Talk to the postmaster,” I said.

And that’s what I want to talk about today.  Your sense of entitlement.

Many of us believe that because we’ve been practicing, doing the work, paying our dues, that we are entitled to something from the world.

I will say this.   If you do the work and you become good at what you do, you are entitled to something…self satisfaction for a job well done.   But THAT’s IT!

No matter how hard you work, no matter how many dues you pay, it doesn’t entitle you to a place at the top.    What it does do when you do the hard work is prepare you so that if you do luck out and get the shot, you can deliver the goods; you can shine in that spotlight because you’ve prepared for it your whole life.

It doesn’t mean your entitled to it.   You may think you deserve it (and at some point I suspect we all do) but you are not entitled to it or anything else.

This attitude will get in your way.  As it got in the way of the bimbo that wanted me to put my life on hold so that she could breeze through her life.   

The fact of the matter is, had she said, “excuse me, I am in a terrible rush and you have so many packages.  Would it be possible for you to step aside for a moment and let me mail mine?”   I would have done it in a heartbeat.

But her sense of entitlement did not allow for me to have the right to do anything that might make her life inconvenient.

If you have a large sense of entitlement, lose it.  It’s a bad look on anyone.